While going through an old keepsake box of mine, I came across a Christmas card from my mom from a few years back. Referencing a handmade pillow case she had gifted to my first born that read “Dream Come True,” she wrote in the card,
Merry Christmas Aaron, Jessica, and Brody!
Although I tried to tie some humor into your gifts, I have a serious message behind them.
‘Keep Your Dreams Alive’
Fall into sleep with that thought and you’ll be rewarded a fulfilling life. Strive to keep ’em alive! Always remember YOU were one of my ‘dreams come true’ and despite life’s hardships, I feel rewarded times over and totally fulfilled.
When I found this Christmas card, we were in the middle of packing up our home of eight years and preparing to move our family across the country. Just a few weeks prior, we found out we were expecting baby number six. We knew we wanted six kids, so although we weren’t necessarily surprised by the outcome, we were definitely surprised by the timing.
Big changes were starting to take place and I was so overwhelmed. But with the sudden realization that everything we had been working so hard to achieve was now coming to fruition, we could hardly believe we were finally at the end of this chapter.
Trust Your Journey
Before I get too far ahead of myself, I should mention when my husband and I first started dating, we discussed wanting somewhere between two and four kids. After quickly and unexpectedly falling pregnant with our first, we decided we wouldn’t commit to any specific number. But rather take it just one kid at a time. We figured what was meant to be will always be.
At some point during my third pregnancy, I knew I wanted more. Maybe it was because I enjoyed being pregnant or because I LOVED being a mom. For whatever reason, six now seemed to be the magic number and I wanted to be done having babies by the time I was 30. But dedicating a whole decade (and my entire 20s) to being pregnant or nursing has proven to be no easy feat. There were times I felt like I was thrown into shark infested waters. Time to sink or swim, Jess. Yet, somehow, I always returned to the water’s surface with more grit and determination to handle whatever motherhood threw at me.
My personal health and fitness goals have taken the back burner for years. I know I’ve walked passed a mirror or two and groaned at the person looking back at me. Those tired eyes, stretch marks, and extra baby weight left much more to be desired. But with each kid, I’ve grown a deeper appreciation for my body and how gracefully it carried me through some of the toughest days of my life.
“Stop and smell the roses,” people would say. Yet, I never understood the meaning of that until I became a mom. That’s because I realized it is so easy to get caught up in the monotony of our daily responsibilities that we forget to pause and appreciate what’s taking place in our home. How did these incredible kids come from those once tiny and very needy babies?! This journey is what makes being a mom so rewarding.
Embrace the Destination When You Get There
While staring at those two lines on a home pregnancy test I realized in the blink of an eye, everything I wished for had come true. I failed to listen when people warned me not to wish the days away because the years would fly by. Now, I’m stuck between wanting time to speed up in anticipation of our newest arrival, while also begging for time to slow down so I can take in the last of this pregnancy glow and the sweet baby kicks.
My husband and I may not always appreciate the chaos that has resulted from our big dream. But we do recognize what a blessing it is. While we are sad to be closing this chapter of our lives, we are also fully embracing the new chapter that is about to start. The one where we quit collecting baby items and start collecting more memories as a complete family of eight. Life is so good and I know it will only continue to get better from here.
